So we had our little meeting. The dating analogy resonated with Harry, but more from the perspective of “internet date fatigue”. Putting yourself out there on date after date certainly gets tiring. I remember the night we met, how I went through the motions of doing my makeup and straightening my hair, how I sat on the train thinking, Can I really do this again? Have drinks with a stranger and try to seem interesting? I almost got off the train and went home.
The prospect of researching another location and making all that emotional investment… we were flagging before we began. But suppose I had got off that train? I have no way of knowing what my life might have been like, but I don’t want to imagine a life without Harry. Who knows, there could come a time when we don’t want to imagine a life without Devon.
Because Devon is next up. Not for any specific reason, but it’s on the list and and a number of friends on Facebook recommended that we take a look. The initial plan was to quite quickly undertake a lot of fact-finding and go down in April to look around, but I was immediately daunted by the scale of the research. Devon is a big area with two coastlines and we’d like to look at both towns and villages. I’d only made a tentative start before I began to feel overwhelmed. I managed to check that the houses appeared to be within our price bracket and that rural villages seem much better served by both buses and trains than their Pembrokeshire equivalents, but then I ran out of energy.
It was clear that neither of us was relishing the prospect of some sort of relentless relocation hunt, and it wouldn’t allow us to judge the area fairly if we went down with a sense of resentment, so we’ve decided that rather than try and cram it all into a weekend or two, we’ll spend a week there in July as a sort of working holiday. Harry has booked a sweet little Airbnb cottage by the south coast so that we can relax as well as investigate, and my daughter may come too.
Despite giving ourselves a breather on the research front and trying to make it fun, we both have misgivings and it’s hard to figure out why. Even if we decide that we don’t want to live there, the worst that can happen is that we have a nice summer break, right?
We talked out these feelings and where they might be coming from. “I’m scared we’ll find somewhere we like more than Pembrokeshire,” Harry admitted, and I knew exactly what he meant. Maybe the next date will be the date, the one more likely to lead to a solid future. But then we would have to let go of that intense first love. And that would be hard.
This blog shows you the most recent post first. To see where our journey began scroll down or click here