Mapping our future

So we’re both supposed to be thinking carefully and logically about our next steps. The problem is that I often think with my heart, not with my head.

My head is at least making an effort. It says: OK, what if we can’t find a house we like in Pembrokeshire? What if we can find one, but it’s in a village with little public transport? What if something unforeseen comes to light and we decide it’s just not for us? It would make sense to at least look for a backup option. Who knows, there’s an outside possibility that we’d find somewhere that we like even more.

Only since we got back I can’t stop thinking about Narberth. When we were there, London felt like some kind of a distant memory. Now we’re back, it’s Pembrokeshire  that seems like a dream. I feel clingy. I don’t want it to slip away.

I’ve started researching villages in the area, noting bus routes and amenities like shops, pubs and village halls. I keep poking around on Google Street View, dragging my unwilling little avatar past churches and bus shelters and up residential streets that peter out into narrow country roads. My hope is that when an agent  – eventually, eventually, I must remember that nothing will be happening for ages – recommends a house, we will know whether it’s somewhere we would want to be.

I have spent several happy hours (I did say I was a bit nerdy) with an Ordnance Survey map, marking the bus routes with coloured pencils, drawing circles around villages and affixing sticky arrows showing distances in minutes to Narberth, Tenby and Haverfordwest. I bought a pair of compasses and some new Sharpies especially.

I crouch over the map spread across the carpet, and my heart says: I’m pretty damn emotionally invested in Narberth, aren’t I?

Harry and I have set aside some time tomorrow to talk over our conclusions. We weren’t supposed to share our thoughts until then, but I already know he wants to see other places. I almost typed “people” there, because that’s how it feels. If you’re smitten in the early days of a relationship do you commit, knowing it’s probably too early, emotionally risky? Or do you remain pragmatic, carry on dating, secure in the knowledge that if you have found the right one it will become obvious in time?

I guess it depends on your outlook.

(Hint: after I met Harry, I never went on another date again.)

 

This blog shows you the most recent post first. To see where our journey began scroll down or click here

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